Thursday, April 9, 2020

Is It Worth Being A Good Person?

Have you ever been so close to an emotional breakdown, that even the smallest thing like dropping your sandwich sends you on the floor, crying your eyes out?

That was me two days ago. The only good thing is, I'm a really ugly crier, so every time I start crying, I make myself laugh because of how ridiculous I look when I'm bawling.

The world is a scary place right now. And not because of the virus, but because of people. Obviously, everyone is aware that there are pretty bad people in this world, however, it takes a global epidemic to see how truly shitty the mankind can be. 

People are trying to scam those who help, trying to get some money, things or attention for no reason and so on. But what surprises me the most in this whole global mess, is how truly mean and pathetic some people can be. I usually don't read any news and specially the comments, simply because there is never anything good. It's mostly just lies and fabricated garbage, just to get people all riled up. However, since I live far away from my family and friends, I like to be updated on the current situation back at home, so I have to read the news whether I like it or not. But, unfortunately, the little devil in me makes me also click the comments, and that's where things start to go wrong.

There are so many articles about people not being able to get back home because the borders are closed. And to me that's sad and scary. But the comments mostly consist of: "It's your own fault. Stay where you are, we don't need you and the virus here. If you wanted to leave so bad, then don't come back. I hope you get the virus." Or, whenever there's an article about a politician or a celebrity getting the virus, people post comments like: "You deserve it! Finally! I hope you die!"

Now, the last one is the scariest one. How pathetic does ones life have to be in order to wish something so bad to someone else? This jealousy, this anger, spite and hatred towards someone they don't even know. Where is it coming from? And why? Why are there so many bad people in this world?

And this brings me back to my meltdown. I'm not claiming I'm an angel or a saint, however, my whole life I've tried to be a good person. I donate money to charities, I adopt animals instead of buying them, I've bought gifts to children for Christmas, I've bought food for a lot of homeless people, I always help all my friends and family and so on. Countless times people have told me that I'm actually too nice.

I do all this without expecting anything back, because I truly believe in Karma. And I can't complain about my life, because I know so many people have it way worse than I do. However, for the last couple of months, a lot of bad things have happened to me and my family. We barely get back on our feet from one problem when the next one occurs. So the other day, after months of stress and financial problems, when I dropped that sandwich, that was the tipping point. And as I sat on the floor, weeping in total defeat, I couldn't help but ask out loud: Why do bad things happen to good people? Is it even worth being a good person? 

And the answer is Yes. Here's the thing. I know I'm too nice, there's no denying it. I let people take advantage of me, I do work for my friends for free, I don't ask enough money for my work, because I hate asking people for money, I care too much about others and their problems, I've been scammed twice, because I only tend to see the good in people, and so on. Those are obviously my mistakes and I try to learn from them. BUT! I do think it's worth being a good person. Being good costs nothing, but it means everything. One act of kindness could brighten someone's day or even save someone's life. And if I can make even the smallest difference in a world full of grayness, I will do it. Being good makes me feel like there's hope. Hope for a better future, a better society. And if there's ever a time to quote a line from one of my favorite movies, this is it:

"Hope is a good thing, maybe the best of things. And no good thing ever dies."
/Stephen King

Be good, be kind, be safe!
Take care.
-B-

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