some ugly thoughts and tough decisions

Finally it's Spring time here! Usually when my dad opens the curtain in my room in the mornings, my reaction is NOOOOO!!! ;D but now I wait for him to come and do it, cause I just love the sun that shines on my face every morning. In days like this I know it's gonna be a good day. It's funny how a simple sunshine can brighten not only the day, but people mood as well.

I know I've been lazy and not posting for a long long time, but time is flying and there's so much to do. We have all these events at school since It's my Senior year, and I have managed to make some decisions.

I wanted to study abroad. I've been talking about that for one or two years. But I kinda freaked out and didn't get any papers done or any research. So I had to come up with something. And I did. Kinda. For all this time I told everyone I don't like Latvia, I want to live somewhere else etc. but recently I realized, I have been lying to everyone, including myself. I wanted to study abroad, so I could rub it into somebodies face. But thankfully I realized, how pathetic and ugly that is. And that I'm better than that. Although I feel stupid for even thinking like that. I can achieve any goal I set for myself. As long as I'm doing something for myself and not for others - I'll be ok =] plus, I have too many values here and I love this country. It'll always be my home. And I'm having fun here.

So now I just have to make a choice between two options.

Option number one: I could study as a translator. I'm good with languages, it's one of the best universities in Latvia and there are 40 places for scholarships. And I'm almost 100% sure I would get in. The school itself is perfect,prestige, beautiful and nice. [however, it may be too perfect for me, cause I didn't feel that comfortable there].

Option number two: I could study psychology. I love helping people, I'm a good listener and even now my friends and classmates are coming to me for advice. I should get a planner, cause many people want to talk to me about their problems. And I've loved psychology since elementary school.

My problem is, that I would actually really like to study psychology and become a psychotherapist, but this profession isn't that popular in Latvia. People here don't like to open up to therapists and not that many go to them. So I'm kinda afraid I won't have a job later...

But as a translator, I know I would always find a job. 

So now I don't know what to do. I guess I just want someone to tell me that no matter what I choose, I'll do great.

Only two months till exams, and I have to make a decision soon. Thankfully I have the next week off, cause of Spring holidays. I'll have some time to clear my head and gather my thoughts. 

I promise to catch up with all your blogs :) I miss your stories and I hope everyone is having a good time :)

Take care for now :)

-B-