Be grateful...

Why is it that people turn extra good, nice and polite only during Christmas time? And I'm not saying this only about others. It's the same for me. Well, I try to be nice and polite all the time  but around Christmas those qualities get more popular among people. And only when the air is filled with snowflakes, love, Christmas spirit and the smell of gingerbread, people start to appreciate what they have.

My mom is the best example for all this.

Every year around Christmas time there are few charity events in Latvia and one is a really special one. Before the main ceremony there are urns in every store for people to donate money for disabled children. There are 10 special kids who are chosen and the main goal is to gather money for them. But then they also tell the real amount of money that would be necessary to help all the disabled children in Latvia. And every year people actually donate enough money to help everyone.

Me and my mom, we always donate to this charity. And when we watch the main ceremony, my mom always says: "Looking and these kids make me realize how much we actually have. And it's not about the money. We have our health!" and that just makes me so mad, because my mom is a pessimist. She always complains about everything and nothing is ever good enough. And only looking at these kids she realize that her life is not so bad after all.


However, few days later I was angry with myself for doing something similar.

on December 26 there is an event called "pride of Latvia". It is an event where few people get an award for something they've done this year. And it is not for famous people. I'll tell you a bit about the winners and their nominees so you understand it.

1.- The rescuer - A young woman got this award  because she saved a drowning boy from a pound.


2.- The teacher - A 90 year old teacher got this award for inspiring kids and teaching them to play checkers. He's still active and a really good teacher because one of his students got 6th place in Worlds Championship.

3.- The countryman - a businessman got this award. He grew up in a small region and when he went to university in the big city, the rich city boys made fun of him because he was from the countryside. However, now he's a successful businessman and every year he donates money to his districts school. He buys clothes, glasses and other things for the kids. I think it is super nice.

4.- Guardian angels - 10 men got this award for saving 2 Estonian rally pilots. When their car flipped into the water, these men automatically reacted and saved their lives. 


These are just few of the nominees. I think all these people are amazing. So why was I angry with myself? Because I always say that Latvians are rude, impolite and simply a gray nation. However, watching this ceremony I had tears in my eyes and I was proud that Latvia has such brave and amazing people.


My point in all of this is - people, please be grateful for everything you have!!! Don't wait til Christmas to feel warm inside. Think of what you have and smile! Stop complaining about everything! Be happy with who you are and what you have! :)

There are a lot of things I complain about all the time. But I alsto have a lot to be grateful for. I have an amazing family, friends people who care about me and people who I care about. I have reasons to smile and be happy. And that is what matters the most :)

Happy New Year, everybody :)

-B-   

 

A sweet escape

I got out of my funk that I've been in for the last couple of weeks. And all it took was a little weekend getaway.

Since it was my sisters and friends birthdays we decided to go to Tallinn again. I love that city. I challenged my memory and it turns out it doesn't suck as mush as I thought it did ;D I actually remembered some places and things from the last time. And we even got everywhere we needed by a bus! which is surprising cause you cannot trust me with these kind of things ;D

Anyway, the weekend was perfect. We used CouchSurfing for accommodation again, only this time it didn't feel like CS. For me it was simply staying at friends house :) Nice talks and couple of drinks at night was just what we needed. Except for Milli Malika. That drink I didn't need at all nor will I ever need it! :D But I'm glad I tried it. Every experience is an experience ;D


I also really enjoyed watching Evelins presentation about her Bucket list. I think it's amazing when you know what you want and you do everything to reach your goals and dreams. So, Evelin, if you're reading this - I will steal a part of your idea! ;D I also want to make such a list so that I have something to reach for. I think this list is what keeps you motivated and that is why I want to try it too. I hope you don't mind. :)  A few things on that list will be similar to yours like countries to visit etc. but the others will include raccoons so they will be completely different ;D


Even if I spent only 24 hours in Tallinn, being there really made me happy and relaxed and for this short period of time I completely forgot about all the problems and stress and just had fun! And it made me realize that life truly can be full of fun and surprises if you let yourself enjoy it :)

And I also wanted to wish you all a little belated Happy Thanksgiving :) 

Have a wonderful day, everyone :)

-B-

P.S.-I also promise to catch up with all your amazing blogs. I just haven't had the time to write or read any. :)

[ Milli Malika ]

And some pictures from Tallinn

I need help! All heroes please apply.

I've been in a funk lately and it's quite hard for me to get out. 

As much as I'm trying to stay positive, there is so much shit going on and I can't take it anymore.
There is no more idiotic education system in the whole world like in Latvia. And now, due to a reform in the system, I will probably have to figure out what to do next year, cause my program will probably be shut down. I get that some changes are needed, but why is it needed to mess up everything for those, who have already started something? 

I'm devastated right now, cause if this happens, what the hell am I going to do? I'll have waisted a YEAR of my life. For nothing. And the thought of that just makes me angry. 

I know that everything can still change, cause it's not the final word. But yet, I see no hope in all this and the stress is killing me. I can only be positive for this long. And it scares me to be this grey person. Cause I don't want to be like this. But I can't seem to snap out of it... I seriously need a friendly help. All heroes please apply!

-B- 

I'm so glad I live in a world where there are Octobers.

Today is The perfect Autumn day. Not too hot, not too cold, not too sunny, not too cloudy. It's Perfect!!  These are the days when my dog knows he's going to get a good long walk out of me. 

If there is one thing I love about Autumn in Latvia, it's the view. The leafs are in all kinds of colors and the nature simply looks breath taking.

So, I know I haven't been posting and commenting for a long long time, and I do apologize for that, but I didn't feel like writing and I've been in a funky mood for the last two months. The University has challenged me to stay optimistic. Well, guess what, University, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED! 

Even though I can't stand the mess and problems school has given me, I'm gonna try stay as positive as I can be. After all, I'm doing this all only for myself and my future. Although it's bringing me some trouble and messing up my plans. 

I really wanted to use ERASMUS program next year. It's a program where I can go and study abroad for a whole semester. The only problem is, my university has a crappy list of partner universities in Europe. I'm gonna try my best to figure out if I want to go to any of them. But so far it looks like I'll have to stay in Latvia. Which sucks, by the way. 

The good thing is, that I'm doing really well at university. My grades are almost perfect. I got an A in Philosophy. In your face, Aristotle! LOL. 

Anyway, I'm just gonna try and succeed in everything I do. and then I'll see where the future takes me ;D I just have to figure out ways to stay happy and positive. One of them is Hockey. ;D I'm skipping one lecture on Monday to go to a Hockey game. At least that keeps me happy. ;D

I also promise to catch up with all your blogs. I can't wait to see what you've all been up to. :) 

Have an amazing weekend :)

-B-  

Here are some pictures from my walk today :)

 [Ok,this was taken 2 weeks ago ;D]

 [the view outside my window]

1 week down, 39 more to go

University is going to suck!

 -That's what I said a month ago, and yet, I partly stick to that sentence. Don't get me wrong, it's not all bad. Some lectures are really interesting and even fun. Although I see nothing fun in philosophy other than the fact that the professor calls all the women "madams" and most of the lecture he's talking with his eyes closed. 

The part that I don't like is the people. Some stuck up snobs who has nothing but their parents money to keep them in school. I've said several times that I really dislike arrogant people. And I have several of them in my course. And the thought of having group assignments is terrifying. I can't work with people like that. And the worst part is that they talk when nobody asks, but they are quiet when it's necessary to speak their mind! 

but, despite that, I'm here with my sister and I'm having fun most of the time :) 
I'm learning German. And I feel like in kindergarten, learning numbers and letters ;D but I'm progressing fast! :) 

Studying at University takes hard work, and I think my laptop will explode eventually :D And since I'm a total wimp, I miss home and my dog and cat and mommy and daddy :D

Basically, the first week is over and I hope the rest of them fly like the wind. I want this year to be over as soon as possible.

And I realized two things - University is not for me...Tourism, however, totally is :)

Take care,

-B-  

Life happens while you're making other plans :)

Finally I've got everything under control and I'm ready for a new start. I won't say that I have time to relax, cause I've had it too much lately and I don't wanna sound lazy ;D which I am. But that's not the case.

I got my exam results last week. If anyone's curious:

English - B [I am 1% away from A :( ]

Latvian - B

Math - B

Russian - C [with this I'm so happy, cause I thought it was going to be Z ;D ]

And with the results, came the big question - What to do next? I've said it a couple of times that I've figured out my plans for the future, but actually I changed them like 100 times or even more. And I made the decision about what to study, the day before applying for University. As crazy as this sounds, I'm actually happy about my choise. I applied for  Tourism Management. I was really nervous about it until last night, when I got an email, which said that I'm ACCEPTED! and not only that, because of my good exam results, I got into a budget group, which means I don't have to pay for the studies! Now I am super happy and excited. Because this saves me a lot of money, which I don't have ;D

Before all this, I was feeling really down and stressed. That was because of many reasons. One of them was because I didn't know what to study. Another reason was that all my closest friends are leaving. Linda [with her amazing artist talent] is heading to Canada, another good friend already is in London, and my closest friend is flying to Boston in September.

All this made me sad and happy at the same time. I'm super happy about all of them. But I'm sad, cause they are my closest friends. And without them here I'm alone. I just really hope our friendships are strong enough to not disappear. :) 

Anyway, I was worried about being alone. If you know me, you know that I'm afraid of new beginnings. But, now I'm feeling more happy and I still have friends and family who support me. And I know now that everything's going to be just fine :) 

All I have to do now is sign a contract with the University, find an apartment and head towards the future :)

-B- 

Graduation is not the end; it's the beginning

Today is the day of my graduation. Even if I'm not going to the ceremony [please don't ask why] I feel blessed and loved from people around me. It hasn't hit me yet, that I've graduated high school. I think I'll completely realize it only in September, when I'll be going to university. Btw - I totally changed my plans for my future, but I'll wrote that in some other post. :) Today I'm not writing anything too long. I just wanted to let everyone know, that I am happy for all the friends and family I have :) I love you all so much and you are amazing and I'm happy I have you all in my life :) 

Peace, and much love :)

-B-

today is a perfect day for a perfect day :)

So, my last post was super sad and stuff, BUT! life has been absolutely good after that. My relationship with my mom is perfect  and we are all living happy ever after ;D

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ 

I recently started to be scared of the future. All I've left is this free summer and than in September it's school again. Plus half of July I'll have to deal with all the papers and everything. Sometimes I truly wish I could escape this part where I have to study and just teleport myself to the future where I already have a good job and I can take care of myself. But, then I think about all the cool stuff I can do while I'm a student. I will still have free time to relax and my only worry will be school. And nothing else. So I decided not to think about future for a while. And just live for the moment. And I discovered that Life is awesome :) 

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ 

laugh of the day:

Today is my parents wedding anniversary, so KISSES MOM AND DAD :)

so I made a cake for them. and all I can say is LOL! ;D

you cannot give me all kinds of cute stuff. let me explain - I recently went to a grocery store. I shouldn't have done that ;D cause there was a sale on cake supplies. All kinds of glazes,  frosting markers, sprinkles... it was all there! and of course I took everything ;D 

So when I was making a cake today, of course, I used everything! ;D I was like a little kid with markers and pencils. I just went nuts. I put on chocolate glaze, covered it with thousands of rainbow sprinkles and to top that, I totally messed with frosting markers ;D 

And that is how world's most ugliest cake was made ;D

-but, I figured, since they're my parents, they'll have to like it no matter what ;D

 [I can't stop laughing about it ;D ]

Have an awesome day everybody :)

-B- 

I hate days like this...

I made my mom cry today.

And may I say - it was the worst feeling in the whole wide world. But the thing that worries me the most, is that I don't have the courage to even apologize to her. Whenever I've done something, I just leave it... Sooner or later we start talking again and everything goes back to normal. But when I really think of this, I'm ashamed that our relationships are like this. 

I would love to go to her, hug her and say MOM, I'M SO SORRY. But I never do it. Why? Because I'm afraid she might reject me. I know this sounds stupid, cause , come on, she's my mom. How could she, right? But she has that kind of character, which I cannot explain. I truly don't know how she would react. Of course she's hugged me before when I feel down. But that's not the same as when we fight.

Another thing - I have never said I LOVE YOU to my mom. To be honest - I have never said it to anyone. And I don't think anyone has ever said that to me either. On this years mothers day I got my mom the biggest bouquet of tulips and I even made a speech, which included those words. But when I got to my mom, all I said was CONGRATS! and gave her the flowers and a kiss.

Days like this just make me feel like I'm the worst person in the world.And I couldn't find the courage to change something...

That was until 5 minutes ago! Since I was feeling totally bad for everything that happened today, I just went to a store, bought the most beautiful flower I could find, came home, gave it to my mom and said MOM, I'M SO SORRY FOR EVERYTHING.and hugged her. Than she cried and I cried and than I laughed cause I cry really ugly ;D

Anyway, today is the day when I overcame my fears and I am so glad I did, cause there is nothing better than pure love :)

take care,

-B-  

Life is good, but I'm better ;D

This time I have a completely good excuse for not being here - my computer is broken. So today my friend has to put up with me, cause I'm like an addict going through every website ;D I have missed so many awesome stories and I can't wait to get my computer back to read them all. But, I also don't want him back for several reasons. As much as I've missed your posts, I've never been this relaxed.  I have time for myself, my family, friends and relaxing.


A couple of awesome things have happened to me these last weeks. 


First, on May 13 was Mother's Day in Latvia. So a little belated Happy mother's day to all you-wonderful amazing moms out there :) 


Another awesome thing - I turned 19 on May 12. And may I say- this was THE BEST birthday ever! And all thanks to my wonderful friends and family.


My friend bought bus tickets to Tallinn [Estonia] and we both celebrated my birthday there.
Thanks to couch-surfing, I had so many amazing experiences. 
If someone doesn't know what couch-surfing is - it's a website where people from all over the world offer their homes for travellers to stay at. And we got an amazing host. She showed us the town, took us sightseeing and took us out at night so I could have some birthday shots ;D


The town was beautiful and we were walking for 5 hours and still didn't manage to see everything. Then at night, it was a completely different view. There were millions of people and clubs, pubs and parties around every corner. We went to few clubs and the people there were amazing and so nice! Everyone who found out I had a birthday, immediately hugged me and wished me a happy birthday. The shots were good, the music was amazing and the people were simply awesome. 


When I got back home, I had my second surprise - my friends got me the best presents ever ;D 


a little back story:
-I never pay any attention to how much fuel I have left in my car. So there have been few situations when my car simply stops cause it's out of fuel. 


For that to never happen again, one friend got me can of fuel for emergencies ;D lol. My friends know me so well :D 


So I had the best birthday, I got the best presents and I'm in such good mood I can't even explain it. 
And now when my computer is broken, I will have some time to study for my exams. The English exam is on  Tuesday, so wish me luck :)


I have some other stories but I want to catch up with your blogs first :) I don't know how [cause my computer will be broken for a while], but I will manage to do it. :) 

Meanwhile, enjoy yourselves :)

you are all amazing :)

-B-   

Here are some pictures from my birthday :)

Today you are You, that is truer than true. There is no one alive who is Youer than You.

AGAIN! I haven't been here for a really long time! but this time I have no excuses ;D I've just been lazy. So sorry for that. 

I'm not gonna write some story or something, just a few random things that have happened in my life this last month and I still have some debts left.

So here I go:

*First, I owe someone a book review. It's not going to be long, cause I think people are more attracted to short reviews. Otherwise they can simply read the book.

 

[The picture was taken from Haritha's blog]

"The New Death and others". Written by James Hutchings

 "44 short stories, 19 poems, no sparkly vampires."

"In the beginning of the world the gods considered all those things which did not have their own gods, to decide who would have responsibility and rulership.
"I will rule all flowers that are sky-blue in colour," said the Sky-Father.And so it went.
At last all had been divided, save for one thing.
"Who," asked the Sky-Father, "shall have dominion over the poor?"

There was a long pause. The gods shuffled their feet and avoided one another's gaze. At last a voice broke the silence.
"I will," said Death." 

I, personally, loved this one the most. 

Although the stories are really short, they get right to the point. Dark fantasy, weird, strange stories but with amazing everyday life irony. I don't usually read this kind of books. I'm not into fiction at all, even more DARK fiction. But that only made me more curious to read it. And I actually really liked this book. It didn't take much time to read it. [It took me this long to post a review cause I'm lazy-remember? ;D] The stories made me think about values of life, about myself, and it completely made me change my mind about many things.

So thank you James, for giving me this opportunity to read your book, write a review and actually find out something new about myself :)

*Now onto the next thing. A long time ago I received an email from Christine Chu. She told me about her idea to create a diet/fitness website/app. "For me, I think the problem with being healthy is motivation. It's an abstract, overwhelming goal. I think the best way to counter this is to have concrete, winnable games and small victories." said Christen. So the website is ready, and she asked me to put it on my blog. So here it is www.slimkicker.com

If any of you is interested, please take a look :) I think it's pretty interesting and her idea is amazing :)

*Now something about myself.

-Since the weather is finally AMAZING! I'm relaxing and enjoying every second I've left before the exams, who, btw, start on May 22.

So for now, I'm barbecuing, road-tripping [is that even a word?] and having fun. 

-I also missed my one year anniversary at blogger. Which was on April 5th. Since I didn't write a post about it ;D I'm just gonna say it now - I am beyond happy to be here. The last year has been a real journey, I've met some amazing people here and I hope we will stay friends for a long long time. And I really hope I get to meet you all one day :) Thank you for being so amazing :)

-I went to the school that I've chosen to study at. And I found out some interesting things and I'm now completely sure about what I'm gonna do and study. And this feeling is wonderful.

-And I've also started something completely new. I'm learning Norwegian. It is completely different from all the other languages I know and I love it :) If you're going to ask me WHY ARE YOU LEARNING IT? I can't answer you. I don't have a strict goal for it. I just wanted to do it, and I really like it :)

Well...that's about it. I've been quite busy, quite lazy, but mostly, I've been [and still am] Happy :) 

Have a wonderful day everybody :)

-B-